Some Catholic parishioners experience situations in which pastors make liturgical and pastoral decisions without wide consultation of the parish community. Some priests have introduced outdated but permitted rituals like kneeling, altar railings, head coverings, Latin as the liturgical language, and communion on the tongue. Without wide consultation or input, parishioners feel disconnected and powerless. If they speak of their dissatisfaction to the pastor, they experience being silenced or dismissed. Many feel unwelcome in a church that was once their spiritual home.
How can we create a positive document as a teaching guide for laity who wish to help a priest who is not ready to promote synodality or develop the communion of the faithful?
What are some concrete steps that parishioners can take that would make the pastors responsive to their experiences?
An important shift.
Parishioners should move from expressing individual dissatisfaction to creating a respectful, organized, documented way for the experience of the parish community to be heard.
There is a legitimate Catholic basis for doing this. The Code of Canon Law does not envision laypeople as passive recipients of clerical decisions.
- Canon 212 §2 says that the faithful have the freedom to make their needs and desires known to their pastors;
- Canon 212 §3 goes further, saying that they have the right, and sometimes the duty, to express their opinion about matters concerning the good of the Church.
The main issue is whether the pastor is using legitimate options pastorally, collaboratively, and with sensitivity to the people entrusted to his care. This is a strong argument.
1. Stop arguing primarily about "traditional vs. progressive"
Rather than saying, "Father is too conservative," say:
"These pastoral decisions are having these effects on the people of this parish."
For example:
- People who previously felt at home now feel like outsiders.
- Older parishioners feel their experience and contributions are being disregarded.
- Young families are becoming less engaged.
- People feel uncomfortable approaching the priest.
- Parish ministries are losing participation.
- People no longer feel that their voices matter.
- There is an increasing sense of "Father has decided, there is nothing we can do."
The conversation moves from ideology to pastoral effectiveness.
2. Gather experiences rather than grievances
A small group of parishioners could quietly conduct a listening process. This has to be formulated well. Instead of saying, “We don’t like what the pastor is doing,” ask questions such as:
- Do you feel welcome in our parish?
- Do you feel that your voice is heard?
- Do you feel comfortable approaching the pastor with a concern?
- What changes have strengthened your experience of parish life?
- What changes have made you feel less connected?
- What would help our parish become a more welcoming spiritual community?
- Do you believe parishioners have meaningful opportunities to participate in decisions affecting parish life?
The results could be summarized without identifying individuals. This creates something much more powerful than complaints: a pastoral picture of the community.
3. Use the parish pastoral council
This is particularly important.
Canon 536 provides for a parish pastoral council, when the diocesan bishop judges one appropriate, in which the faithful participate in fostering the pastoral activity of the parish. It is consultative rather than governing, so it does not give parishioners a veto over the pastor, but it provides an established structure through which the experience of the community can be brought into pastoral deliberation.
If a parish has a pastoral council, parishioners should ask: Is the council functioning as a vehicle for pastoral listening, or has it become merely ceremonial?
If there is no council, parishioners can ask the diocese what the norms are for establishing one. The goal should be to make the council a place where questions such as these can legitimately be discussed:
- "How are our liturgical changes affecting participation?"
- "How are we welcoming people who have different spiritual sensibilities?"
- "How are we listening to young adults?" older adults? Women?
- "How do we know whether parishioners feel spiritually nourished?"
- "What does our parish need in order to become a stronger community?"
4. Create a parish listening forum
If the pastor will permit it, ask for an evening that has one purpose: Listening to the experience of the parish community.
It should not become a debate about ideology.
A facilitator could establish rules:
- Speak from personal experience.
- No attacks any person.
- No attacks on traditional or progressive Catholics.
- Everyone gets an opportunity to speak.
- The purpose is listening, not winning.
- The pastor listens without responding to every comment.
That last point could be extraordinarily important. A pastor who is accustomed to answering every criticism can unintentionally turn "dialogue" into another occasion for exercising authority. Sometimes the most transformative thing a pastor can do is simply listen for an hour without defending himself.
5. Put concerns in writing
If individual conversations are repeatedly dismissed, parishioners should begin documenting concerns respectfully.
Write something like this:
“On three occasions parishioners requested an opportunity to discuss the changes in the Sunday liturgy. Each request was declined. We are concerned that there is currently no mechanism through which parishioners can communicate their pastoral experience.”
It is factual, specific, and difficult to dismiss as merely emotional.
6. Build a relationship with the diocesan bishop's office
This is perhaps the most important escalation. A pastor does not exist independently of the diocese. Canonically, a parish is entrusted to a pastor under the authority of the diocesan bishop.
If the pastor consistently refuses meaningful dialogue, parishioners can respectfully communicate their concerns to the appropriate diocesan office.
The message should be a constructive request.:
"We need assistance in establishing a healthy pastoral process for listening and dialogue within our parish."
They can ask the diocese for:
- a facilitated parish listening session;
- a meeting with a diocesan representative;
- assistance establishing or strengthening a pastoral council;
- clarification of diocesan policies;
- mediation between parishioners and the pastor;
- pastoral visitation or assessment.
7. Distinguish liturgical preference from pastoral harm
This is crucial.
A parishioner saying, "I don't like Latin" is one thing. A community saying this is much different:
"The manner in which liturgical changes are being introduced is causing significant numbers of people to withdraw from parish life, and there is no opportunity for dialogue"
Likewise, Communion on the tongue is a legitimate practice. Kneeling is a legitimate posture in appropriate circumstances. Latin is a legitimate liturgical language. The question should therefore not be "Are these practices allowed?" The better question is:
"How are legitimate practices being used, and what pastoral consequences are they producing?"
That keeps the discussion within Catholic ground.
8. Do not allow the pastor to make this about obedience
There is a danger that parishioners will be told:
"The priest is the pastor. You are supposed to obey."
Canon 212 provides a remarkably important counterbalance. Catholic obedience does not eliminate the laity's right to express their needs, desires, and considered opinions concerning the good of the Church.
The appropriate response is not rebellion. It is responsible participation.
In fact, parishioners might say:
"We respect the pastor's authority. Precisely because we love this parish and want to support its mission, we believe we have a responsibility to tell you honestly what we are experiencing."
9. Create a coalition that crosses ideological lines
Coalition building might be the most effective strategy. Do not only organize people who dislike traditional practices. Find people who might say:
- "I love the Latin Mass, but I don't think people should feel excluded."
- "I prefer receiving Communion on the tongue, but I don't want others judged for receiving in the hand."
- "I appreciate kneeling, but I don't want liturgical practice to become a source of division."
- "I respect the priest's authority, but I believe he needs to listen."
- "I am traditional in my spirituality, but I don't want clericalism."
Now the issue is no longer traditional Catholics versus progressive Catholics.
It becomes: What kind of parish do we want to be?
That is a much larger and more compelling question.
10. Ask the bishop to evaluate pastoral fruit
Ultimately, the most compelling question is not: "Does Father have the right to do this?"
but: "Is this pastoral leadership producing the fruits that the Church expects from a parish?"
Canon 529 describes the pastor's responsibility to know the faithful entrusted to him, to visit families, to share their joys and especially their difficulties, and to make every effort to ensure that the faithful receive the Eucharist and participate consciously and actively in the liturgy.
That gives parishioners a very different vocabulary.
They can ask:
Are people being drawn into deeper communion, or are they withdrawing?
- Are people becoming more engaged, or less?
- Are people experiencing the parish as their spiritual home, or as an institution from which they feel increasingly alienated?
- Are differences in spirituality being integrated, or are they becoming sources of division?
These are pastoral questions—not political ones.
11. We can always include a discussion about the power of money. Withholding money can cause the pastor to stop and ask questions.
Power and Belonging
The fundamental Issue is about power and belonging.
A parish is not simply a place where a priest performs the sacraments for an audience. Canon law itself describes a parish as a stable community of the faithful entrusted to pastoral care.
The Church's current discussion of synodality is moving precisely toward the question of how clergy and laity listen to one another and discern together. Recent U.S. Catholic discussion has emphasized that synodality needs to become something ordinary Catholics experience rather than something reserved for specialists.
So perhaps the most constructive goal for these parishioners is:
"How do we create a parish culture in which the pastor can exercise legitimate authority while parishioners genuinely experience themselves as participants rather than subjects?"
That is a much more profound challenge to clericalism.
Parishioners should not have to become angry, rebellious, or anti-clerical in order to recover their voice. They can claim their legitimate place in the Church precisely by acting as mature, responsible members of the Body of Christ—organized, respectful, persistent, and unwilling to disappear quietly.
We have a very fruitful theological framework: authority, listening, synodality, the dignity of the baptized, and the parish as a spiritual home rather than simply an institution governed by a priest.
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